Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Desiree Rogers CEO of Ebony

Let's hope she keeps track of sales!

Rogers, first African-American White House social secretary resigned after letting couple crash Obama's First State dinner. Letting everyone at the door in without double checking their names was the catalyst to her resigning, though that was not in the official statement.

All in all, it seems like a good fit; she did host a lot of important social events with children and wounded soldiers, and Ebony is a forerunner in social and charity events, bringing attention where there needed to be some.

Turnaround for Jeff Lewis

While other celebrities are having meltdowns, Flipping Out's infamous Jeff Lewis is shaping up. Doing better with business, visiting his grandma, all that healthy, boring stuff.

Though really, demanding a drink ideally composed of "70 percent lemonade, 20 percent fruit punch and 10 percent Sprite" is no worse than some Starbucks customers I've seen. Can we say 'Grande half-caf single sugar-free 140-degree, no-foam soy vanilla latte'? Oh, it's happened.

Fantasia's Overdose and Subsequent Press Release

Antwaun Cook is just a heartwarmer of a good man; devoted to his kids, open about his feelings, even had a secret love nest residence separate than his wife for over a year.

So Paula Cook believes Fantasia is responsible for the marriage dissolving by seducing her husband away with her money, while Fantasia believes her boyfriend is honest, innocent, and the scorned wife, Paula, is making up mean, mean lies.

Either they're very, very gullible, or Antwaun is very, very good. Hmmm.

Love the Way You Lie Video Premiers

Why such hate, critics? Because it sends the wrong message to the kids? Now you're just indulging in Em bashing, which is pretty popular, considering movies, television, music videos have all depicted domestic abuse graphically since...pretty much the first minute they could.

Which means it started as a generational trend far before poor Eminem was even born. Can't you tell he's sad when he hurts her? Just look at his soulful blue eyes.

I'd recommend watching the video on silent the first time to get the full visual impact.

Federal Reserve Bails Out America

Do you know what 'Quantitative Easing 2.0 is? It means we are going to be printing us up some more good old American dollars. Since they are not personally handing the money out, or raising up everyone's wages, this once failed proposition is not exciting the masses, for some reason.

Condom With Teeth; Desperate Measure, not new fetish

Developed in Africa by a female scientist who treats rape victims, this was developed to help identify rapists. The applicator has tiny barbs in it, which is all but impossible to remove without a doctor's help. Unless, of course, one is truly a man of steel.
The rate of sexual assault in Africa is exponential, especially compared to the conviction rate of said assailants. This is how the men bond, like drinking beer and fishing, but you know, not.

Of course, this won't prevent rape from beginning, and won't incapacitate the male entirely or his friends at all, but considering the lack of movement in solving the bigger issue, we say a condom with teeth is just what the doctor ordered.

And...No climax for you!

HOPA Girl Quits By Picture Collage

It's the usual story. Office assistant is called racist name by boss, and retaliates by sending out pictures of herself holding up signs calling out her boss's recreational activities during work hours.

At least, it SHOULD be the usual story. Don't bite the hand that set up your office spyware.

Avatar: Legend of Korra

Avatar has a sequel? Fear not, it is the animated show, and not the movie (at this time). It will feature Korra, who the creators believe will appeal to the female audience, as well as male, given Katari's popularity.

Korra's the new Avatar, her mentor is Tenzin, who is eventually revealed to be Katara and Aang's son. This has upset Zutarians, Zuko/Katara fans who had their ship sunk at the end of Avatar. Of course, fans complaining about a show is nothing new, but we love to watch their decay into childish inner-fan fighting. Take Livejournal as a classic example, as they arguing about potential arguments when Tenzin's Mom is revealed.

Oh fans, is there any crazy you don't embrace?

KTUU Might Have Prematurely Evaluated

Source is not reliable as far as Ted Stevens being killed in plane crash, as it turns out, and Family spokesman, Mitch Rose, does not confirm. There seems to be a line between 'not sure if he's dead' and 'is dead' that someone has yet to figure out.

Can anyone lend them a sharp stick?

Portia takes on more Degeneres

Her last name, that is. Oh Portia, how we mourn for you. As Eminem says, "What's Ellen DeGeneres have that I don't? Are you telling me tenderness? Well, I can be as gentle and smooth as a gentleman." While this probably isn't true, we are all a little sad. She ain't ever coming back. And Lindsey Lohan is a poor, poor consolation prize...

Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi have been married for two years, in that brief span of time California allowed same sex marriage licenses, before pulling out faster than your last skeevy boyfriend, and she finally switched to Ellen's surname. She will become Portia Lee James DeGeneres.

OPRAH DEAD!

And Gail Stevens admits 30 year long lesbian affair with lover Oprah!

Just kidding. She's no more dead than Justin Beiber.

This just in!
Justin Beiber dead! And Gay!

Fate Catches Up with Ted Stevens

Eerily like Final Destination, Ted Stevens, Republican GOP Senator, survived plane crash in Alaska 32 years ago that killed five people, including his first wife. Last night he was in a plane crash in Alaska that killed five people. He lived in Alaska, for those unsavvy with politics.

He went to UCLA, Harvard, was a lawyer, and then began his career in politics. He also had this huge scandal in 2008, when he was convicted of lying on Senate forms about home renovations and gifts he received from wealthy friends. Oops! He was later acquitted, but whether it was true or not, that plane took down some influential people.

Sean O'Keefe Passenger of Crashed Plane

Sean O'Keefe, the head of EADS North American unit since November, was involved in a fatal plane crash last night in Alaska. His condition remains unknown. Four of nine passengers survived the crash, the Coast Guard said.

By all reports he was well liked, decisive, and pushed ahead with grand efforts that really paid off. Click the title to read more about him and become more well informed with politics, or something.

UCF Stifles Nude Creativity

College disapproves of half naked women? At least, the University of Central Florida (UCF) does, as they are fired up about Shanna McLaughlin 'duping' coach into letting her and a crew use the men's locker room for racy photos.

I gotta say, UCF, show a little school spirit! That's your mascot right there on that curvy billboard! Don't worry Shanna, we appreciate your contributions to higher education.

Jetblue Flight Attendant Loses His Mind

For that, we don't blame him. After 20 years in the service, Steven Slater finally lost it when an unruly passenger would not listen and 'accidentally' clocks him in the head with her bag. He gets on the PA, curses her out, quits, grabs a beer and illegally pulls the emergency chute and slides to freedom.
Until the police arrested him for that later. There was also an unexplained twenty minute delay before the airlines called the authorities, giving Steven time to go home and make sweet, sweet love to his partner before being taken away in handcuffs. Lucky dog got two climaxes of the hour.

And we're back with a bang!

The Other Guys - Highest Grossing Movie

The Other Guys has its critics, but far more fans. We suspect this is partially because of the giddy relief that it did not really follow in the same fetid footsteps as Ferrel's former films. Yes, that was on purpose.
Samuel L. Jackson and Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson played the big hero cops in the beginning, plot happens, and Ferrel and Wahlberg end up taking over the big case.
Mark Wahlberg is given kudos for doing fairly decent at playing the straight man in a comedy, Samuel parodies himself and The Rock channels Last Action Hero. Oh, Rock, I would walk to the other side of the fence for you.
Ahem!

Some critics are never happy, of course, but in the summer where the Other Movies suck, the Other Guys shines.